Snakes on a Plane

I’m sorry to say, that it comes down to this.

Nobody fucking cares. And why should they? I’m surprised it made eight dollars. Snakes are cool, planes are cool, that kids, is about that. Sorry.

Now I’m sure the effects are great and there are some snake animation that is all slithery and wow. But, really, who fucking cares. And the answer is…Nobody.

Many of us worked on Matrix 3, and during the production I kept hearing. “But Randy, you don’t understand, It’s the Matrix 3” . or “It’s the Matrix!” And when it came out, the world just about broke it’s jaw yawning.

Here is the facts. ninety percent of Science fiction and horror movies suck. That means that nine out of ten movies that we work on are going to suck ass. Here is my list.

Starship Troopers
Komodo
My favorite Martian
the haunting
cats and dogs
Blade 2
Virus
Evolution
cursed
Matrix 3
King Kong

Now the cock suckery in that list is biblical. Starship Troopers and King Kong I am proud of. And Starship Troopers, is questionable as far as being a good movie.

I’ve got a shot in Peter Pan and Monster House and I couldn’t masturbate for a month after working on Peter pan, so I’ll keep those off of my list.

It’s getting to the point that if you want to see a good movie you have to rent a porn film, because those movies won’t let you down. I’m sorry to say that Cursed isn’t worth the time, even if you masturbate through the whole film, believe me, I’ve tried.

So don’t be so down about it. Working in CG means that from now until you get old, you will most likely work on shitty film after shitty film. And I will be right there next to you. jerking off I mean.

I love you people

your pal Randy

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